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A Big Fat Truth: It Isn’t Cute, It Isn’t Sexy-It’s Probably Killing You.

*Note to readers:

This actually started out this morning as a just one of those lengthier type of Facebook status updates. Instead, I kept writing, and writing. I decided it was best shared here instead, which of course will still be shared on Facebook as well. Just not like I originally intended. ~

Here’s what I don’t understand, we can’t even talk about obesity without people getting upset, claiming “Fat Shaming” and if we can’t talk about the real issues without being shut down the moment we start talking them, then we will never be able to deal with any of them.

As many may now know, I’ve decided to get certified as a health and nutrition coach not only to help other people but to help my SELF. Once upon a time, like many of us, I was in tip-top physical shape, a “smokin’ hot body” if I say so myself. There’s some on this list who knew me when and can verify that is true. Over the years, children, busy lifestyle, depression, divorce, and whatever else real-but-still-excuse- I let get in the way, I gained a significant amount of weight.

At one point I was diagnosed with metabolic syndrome some years back, and still I did nothing. I hid from my friends who knew me ‘back-in-the-day” for I knew they’d be shocked at how I looked. I didn’t do much of anything anymore but take care of my girls all the while getting unhealthier by the day.

It wasn’t until something incredible happened in 2012 that I decided to reclaim the life that was mine. I wanted to live a long, healthy life, and be there for my daughters, my granddaughters (I just assume they will be girls too) and their children. I wanted to enjoy life and everything it has to offer. I started a diet and exercise routine, started losing weight and suddenly developed stomach issues. I lost a considerable amount of weight then due to both the diet, exercise and of course the stomach issues that eventually landed me in the hospital having surgery in May of 2012.

Since then it’s been an off and on type of relationship. I’ve made friends with my self, and my body but I realize now I didn’t quite fall desperately-in-love with myself and my body like I should have. So I treated my Self and my body like the good friend you see every now and again; the kind that you don’t have to see or talk often but when you do, it’s like nothing ever changed? Yes, I treated my Self and my body like that.

What I’ve learned is that you can do that with real friends in other bodies, but you can not do that to your self. It’s no good, not very healthy.

I did gain some weight back, then lost it again and then started a short cycle of up a few pounds and then down a few pounds, and all the while getting upset, and frustrated with my body in the process, and like the friend you start to avoid because they are getting on your nerves always complaining about this, or whining about that, I started to avoid my Self, and my body.

Sure, I tried to live the healthy-ish lifestyle, and I did the main things, like eat, sleep and shower. I even kept up my beautifying routine, which brings me to yet another point:

One of my daughters said to me about why I look younger than I actually am, “Mommy, you look so young because you take damn good care, almost obsessive care of your skin naturally and it shows.”

I thought to myself how true that statement was and yet, why did I only stop at my skin? Certainly, that’s not the only reason my skin looks good. There’s environmental factors, genetics, I’m a non-smoker, I drink lots of water, yeah…I feed my skin good stuff, nothing but the best naturally.

Wow. Only my skin?! What the hell is wrong with me?! Here I am obsessing over having healthy looking skin but I wasn’t bothered with making the effort to be healthy in my physical body! Why didn’t I put forth just as much effort in my overall health, and not just focused on my awesome skin care routine?!

Why?! I like having fabulous, youthful looking skin. You’d think I’d want the healthy body to go with that. But something inside of me was sabotaging my efforts to my good health journey, and sadly, apparently it didn’t take much. My focus remained on how to have healthier, more youthful, glowing skin.

No, I’m not interested in looking 21, that’s not the goal. Ironically, my goal was to be a vibrant, radiant, healthy looking woman whatever my age. Yes, that’s right, my goal was to look vibrant, radiant and healthy, without, apparently, actually being healthy.

How oxymoronic is that?

Fat In Florida:

After I moved into my father’s house is when I felt the worst. You can read more about that experience here in the 8 Pearls Of Light That Guided Me Through Hell post. I didn’t exercise, I didn’t yoga anymore, I didn’t even walk. My weight was an issue they liked to talk about, to humiliate me to bring me down, even though they are fat slobs themselves.

I gained a few pounds as if out of rebellion to say, “Eff you! You don’t control my life, and damn sure not my weight.” How stupid was that? Here I was sabotaging my health because my father and is wife are idiots. This is a perfect example of how moving from an ego-centered place will get you screwed every time. And a fatter ass.

Reclaiming Aura

After we moved out, and into our place where we are, I needed time to decompress. I still didn’t jump back-into the weight-loss and healthy-ish lifestyle I was mostly-kind- of-trying to live back in Ohio. I went to work, and have been slowly making our condo our place again.

We’ve now officially been here over 2 months, and I’ve started to find my groove again. Before I left Ohio, a big issue for me then was, “What am I going to do with my life when I grow up?” “What is my calling?” I knew I didn’t want to work in the medical field doing what I do for the rest of my life. Yet, I knew that my calling is to be of service to people, and community. Once I started to settle in here at the condo a bit more, with all of the tension previous months at my father’s house being dissolved into nothingness, these questions were now at the forefront of my mind, and heart once more.

I don’t remember the definitive moment if there was one where I decided enough is enough, and I have to do something. But something indeed happened to me. In a moment of pure, and divine stillness, everything changed. I knew exactly what I wanted to do, what I needed to do, what I was called to do, and I decided right then and there to do it with the same passion, love and excitement I’d do for my loved ones, for my best friend to make their life more comfortable, happy and complete.

I decided to be my own Best Friend. To not only love my Self fearlessly, and courageously despite having ignored my Self for so long, but also to fall IN- Love with my Best Friend, my Self–and I’m falling, deeper and deeper with every day that passed by.

I wanted to do anything, and everything I could for my Best Friend, to show her that I am truly sorry for the way I’ve treated her, the ONE person who’s been with me through every single thing I’ve ever gone through, the ONE person who’s had my back through thick and thin (pun intended); she is the ONE person who took the hit, no matter how hard, for every rotten and stupid choice I’ve ever made. I owed to her, my Best Friend, My Self, do whatever I could to make things right.

Where to start? That was easy. I knew I treated her skin good, so I needed to treat the rest of her good too. I have always been an advocate of natural medicine (rarely ever relying on the doctors and big pharma as I’m terrified of them; working in a hospital and seeing up close and personal what goes on makes me even more weary of the network), raw foods, herbs and supplements, using many almost religiously when sick, and for preventive means. Whatever I did had to be focused somewhere in health and wellness.

Then lightening struck.

I saw an add for Institute of Integrative Nutrition, and I wanted to check that out. The moment I clicked on the link for the website, talked to some graduates, I knew without a doubt, this was for me. The fact that I already have a life coaching background made this even better. This was how I was going to begin to repay my Best Friend, my own beautiful Self back for every poor health decision I ever made.

This is a GIFT of health I am giving to me, Aura, and to my Best Friend-Self because I’m worth it! I realized it’s also a gift I’ll be able to share, and give to other people on the journey to health, wellness and happiness.

So my question is this:

Is there going to be a problem when I’m sharing on the social networks/public platforms what I’m learning, changing and growing from? Is there going to be a problem out there with the sensitive people who might benefit from some of the information I might share, and accuse me of “fat shaming?”

I have no doubt there will be. And that’s simply too bad, and so sad. I’ll not take it personal because I know it’s about their own issues coming to the surface, and something they don’t want to look at. As I’ve already said, I’ve been there. Now I’m on the journey back to healthy, and will gladly share that journey with any one else who wants to walk it, run it, or bike it with me.

Being Fat, Overweight, and Obese isn’t Ugly! It’s just Unhealthy!

Recently, I read an article called, My wedding was perfect and I was fat as hell the whole time”.  While I admit it was a beautiful read, and I’m so glad that the bride felt good in her own skin, as fat as she is (her words), really reading those words, having been where she is, I know that for the most part, women who say, “I’m fat and happy” are only superficially happy. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. Inside, deep inside, we are miserable, frustrated, and it’s not that we don’t want to get the weight off, it’s that we don’t know how. So instead, we opt for the in-your-face-I’m-fat-love-me-or-don’t-I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude.

But we do give a fuck. Deep down, we really do give a fuck.

Oh sure, everyone knows, “Eat less, move your body more burn more fat” –yes, we know this much. But what we have a difficult time doing is getting to the heart of the problem of the weight in first place. Most often, it is a deep rooted pain, and rejection of self on the deepest level, so deep we aren’t even consciously aware of it. So deep, we deny it and say, “Oh hell no, girlfriend, I love myself, every inch of my fat body.”

Lies. All Lies.

It’s a brutal and painful hurt, which is why it’s buried so deep. We don’t want to look at it. If we have to look at it, we have to deal with it. This, to me, is where the whole “fat acceptance” comes in to play.

It’s not about other people having to accept us because we might be fat. Floating pictures of fat women in revealing outfits followed by and supported with encouraging comments meant to boost the self-confidence only helps with the outer-self, the self esteem which is very important. Big women need to know they are beautiful, they are gorgeous as anyone else. And yet, still, no matter what, it all comes back to us accepting ourselves as we are.

This photo of a woman in her black leotard reads, “I’m not “pretty for a big girl”.  I’m pretty period.”Im+not+pretty+for+a+big+girl

Sure she is. She’s god damn gorgeous-as-she-is. It matters not if she’s a big girl in regard to being “pretty” or “gorgeous”. I see that it is the external where everyone’s focus seems to be, on whether or not a woman is beautiful, fat or not.

Of course she is.

 

To me the real questions are these:

Behind her physical beauty, is she healthy? What’s her heart look like? Is she at risk for other life-threatening diseases? And do we do more harm by ignoring the “fat issue” , pretending it doesn’t matter as long as the bigger woman feels attractive, and beautiful?

obeseheart

An over-weight and obese heart. There’s nothing “pretty” or “beautiful” about this.

Fat acceptance starts with ourselves. It’s more than just accepting that, “Sure, yeah I know I’m a big girl/boy”. It’s beyond being stunningly gorgeous on the outside no matter what size you are. That’s external. It’s about the life-long haul; it’s finding the root cause, the emotional, mental and spiritual issue behind all of what’s causing us to hold on to the extra weight that will eventually lead to sickness, and other health issues that could lead to a host of other weight-related dis-eases that can cause early death. It is accepting who we are, and as fat as we are, and giving our fat self nothing but pure love. Real self-love, with the same kind of passion and intensity you’d give to another loved one. It’s the same kind, if not deeper, and stronger love we must give to our own Best Friend–Our Self.

When an overweight and/or obese person is accepted, and loved completely, fully from the self, only then can they begin to see real changes taking place in all aspects of their lives. Interesting enough, when most people fall in love one of the first things that often happens is they lose weight. Imagine falling in deep love with your Self…I’d imagine the weight of deep rooted pain, hurt, and shame carried around for years would begin to fall off, almost effortlessly. I can imagine that because it happened to me.

Interesting how that happens, right?

 

 

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Cleaning Out The Attic

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How I wish I could get inside my brain, to clean and organize it as easily as I do my house. First, I’d take out the trash – all those negative thoughts that get in the way and keep me from doing my best work.
I’d bag up all those old hand -me- down ideas that clutter up my brain and don’t fit me anymore. I’d suck up the cobwebs of less important thoughts so I could see my important ideas more clearly. I’d scrub the floor of complacency, allowing my passions to shine through. I’d wash the windows into my heart and soul so they could speak to me more openly. I’d analyze what I wanted to say and organize it into neat bundles. And finally,  I’d decorate with pictures of good times, encouraging words, and smiles.
~ Elaine Luddy Klonicki

What does it mean to be a priestess or priest of Isis? The Art of Ritual

Isiopolis

I believe that the priestess or priest of Isis should develop some facility with ritual. Of course, this is more important if we are involved in ceremony with other people, less important if we work solitary. But even for solitaries, having some ritual skill benefits our spiritual work by making it more graceful. This, in turn, enables us to be less self-conscious and better able to focus on developing our relationship with Isis.

Ritual is how we human beings do religion. Throughout the world—almost without exception—the practice of religion involves the practice of ritual. Even quiet, private prayer or meditation is normally ritualized in some way. Whether by folding our hands, sitting in a yoga asana, counting a rosary, or simply lighting a candle, some sort of ritual pattern is usually incorporated in spiritual activity.

Ritual is a communicative art that goes beyond what we are able to express by speech…

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Her Dark Gifts: Truth, Beauty, Strength and Love

 

The Charge of the Dark Goddess
Author Unknown

DarkGoddess

Wisdom and empowerment are the gifts of the Dark Goddess of Transformation. She is known to us as Kali, Hecate, Cerridwen, Lilith, Persephone, Fata, Morgana, Ereshkigal, Arianhrod, Durga, Inanna, Tiamat, and by a million, million other names:

Hear me child, and know Me for who I am. I have been with you since you were born, and I will stay with you until you return to Me at the final dusk.

I am the passionate and seductive lover who inspires the poet to dream. I am the One who calls to you at the end of your journey. After the day is done, My children find their blessed rest in my embrace.

I am the womb from which all things are born. I am the shadowy, still tomb; all things must come to Me and bare their breasts to die and be reborn to the Whole.

I am the Sorceress that will not be ruled, the Weaver of Time, the Teacher of Mysteries. I snip the threads that bring my children home to me. I slit the throats of the cruel and drink the blood of the heartless. Swallow your fear and come to me, and you will discover true beauty, strength, and courage.

I am the fury which rips the flesh from injustice. I am the glowing forge that transforms your inner demons into tools of power. Open yourself to my embrace and overcome. I am the glinting sword that protects you from harm. I am the crucible in which all the aspects of yourself merge together in a rainbow of union.

I am the velvet depths of the night sky, the swirling mists of midnight, shrouded in mystery. I am the chrysalis in which you will face that which terrifies you and from which you will blossom forth, vibrant and renewed. Seek me at the crossroads, and you shall be transformed, for once you look upon my face, there is no return.

I am the fire that kisses the shackles away. I am the cauldron in which all opposites grow to know each other in Truth. I am the web which connects all things. I am the Healer of all wounds, the Warrior who rights all wrongs in their Time. I make the weak strong. I make the arrogant humble. I raise up the oppressed and empower the disenfranchised. I am Justice tempered with Mercy.

Most importantly, child, I am you. I am part of you, and I am within you. Seek me within and without, and you will be strong. Know me. Venture into the dark so that you may awaken to Balance, Illumination, and Wholeness. Take my Love with you everywhere and find the Power within to be who you wish.

It’s been awhile! Where have I been? I don’t even know where to start! Hiding in my room almost all summer away from people and of life.  Ahh..what a story that is but I don’t feel like telling it tonight.  I’ll save that one for later as now I’m moved to talk about the darkness and the magic and beauty of it.

THE MOTHER OF DARKNESS

What comes to mind for many of us when we think of the Mother Goddess is nurturing, healing, warmth, light and loving energy.  When we gather to celebrate Her energy, we sing, chant, and play music all that makes reference to Her divine light. We call on it and ask to be illuminated by it; we seek to be baptized in it so that Her brilliance may shine through our being.

There is a man who I’m “friends” with on Facebook who constantly refers to the light and often on his Facebook page he writes that “Truth and Love are only found in the Light”. This guy identifies himself as a medium. I’m not really sure what that means for him but he’s definitely confident that the only way to the truth is through the light and through that light is love.

For him, that may be true. For a lot of us, it may seem to be true. But for those of us who seek the truth, who are students of the ancient mystery schools of esoteric wisdom and such, we know that truth, whatever that may be for one is not the truth of another. We also know that truth and Love are not limited to or found only in “The Light”.

THE LIGHT OF LOVE

Most of us naturally associate love with light. We are conditioned to believe that all things that are light are good and all things dark are bad.  In the spiritual communities, we often see signatures in emails and chats “In Love and Light”. Rarely do we see anyone signing off with “In Love and Darkness” lest we are thought of as having some sort of Gothic Vampire fixation or complex and not actually bestowing a signature departure and blessing of genuine love.  For most of us in general, when we think of Mother Goddess, rarely do we think of Her dark and loving embrace and empowering lessons.

LIGHT OVER DARKNESS

We are taught to favor the light and to always be aligning ourselves with that, moving towards it and dance with it.  Not too long ago we entered the realm of darkness at the autumn equinox.  This offers a time to sit within this growing dark realm and learn of the Dark Mother’s many mysteries.  As the year wanes forth, we will continue to sink deeper into her darkness until the darkest night, the winter solstice in December when Her light is reborn of the earth beginning the new solar year. Come this time, people all over the world in the northern hemisphere in many cultures and with just as many customs will joyously celebrate the return of light to the world again. From that point, the Her transformation from the old Dark Crone to Infant waxing light will be excitedly monitored as we anxiously watch her growth from the newborn sun at the winter solstice to the “Child/Daughter of Light” at Brighnasadh or Imbolc a.k.a “Candlemass” in February.  A time when we celebrate what is said to be ” her stirring and awakening” in the belly of the earth. We do this with candles and milk. Another custom is to wait for the famous groundhog”Punxsutawney Bill” to see his shadow as confirmation of her return to us.  As the wheel turns once more the vernal or spring equinox, in March, when we reach the day and night are equal in length once more, we will stand at the edge ready to bring things into perfect balance, releasing the dark of the year and stepping once more into the season of fire, of light and warmth.

Personally,  I think that most of us spend more time hoping and waiting for the return of the light than embracing and sinking into the darkness and accepting all the dark, magical and healing gifts she has to offer us.

As a woman of the earth, sun, moon and stars, the rain and the wind, the ice and the snow–of light and of darkness it’s an important part of my personal spiritual practice to align myself with the natural energies of the earth.  To flow with it, not fight against it. To slow down now in this time of darkness, to allow me to sleep, dream, and rest as much as I can.  The darkness is indeed a healing time, a learning time, an introspective and transformative time.  It is a time of letting go, of total surrender.

THE POWER OF LIGHT

Yes, there is power in the light and light is power. In the light is awareness and clarity to see all that lie before us or so we believe. Because of our clear vision, we are confident in our beliefs, therefore, we think we understand and know better than we can without the light. The light is our strength, the light is our power, our Excalibur. When we walk in the light we relax more and worry less about not seeing what we need as we erroneously believe that all is or will be made available to us; “All that we can not see will be brought to light”.  Perhaps though, where a balance of darkness is concerned, we might also say that we can become “Blinded by the light.”


IN THE DARK

Darkness has gotten a bad rap. It’s long been associated with all things bad and evil. The unknown, the unseen and the mysterious in general can be a very frightening thing. All these things seem to be shrouded in darkness and because we can not see what’s before us we can feel unsafe and vulnerable in the dark.  Many people are so afraid of the physical darkness that they must leave some sort of night light on in their homes to have a sense of security and safety so that nothing will harm them.  We tell our children to come in before dark to keep them safe. We as women are conditioned to not venture out at night, especially alone because this is when the bad things happen, in the heart of darkness.  We falsely believe that our power is diminished in the darkness.  It’s true, in the dark we can be challenged but our power isn’t diminished. It is when we learn how to tap into and use other sources of power within.

LOVE IN THE DARK

It’s been said by many a philosopher and spiritual teachers that there is only Love and Fear; that the absence of Love is Fear. That doesn’t necessarily mean that absence of Love is darkness or that darkness is something that should be feared. When we open our hearts and choose to live consciously and live and act from a place of pure love for ourselves and others, we are able to see without seeing, feel without touching and recognize that divine love in the heart of darkness.

The unconscious, deep mind where unresolved conflicts and issues such as childhood fears, traumatic experiences, and abuses wait for an opportunity to rise to the surface calling out to us to be heard, to be remembered and receive much-needed healing through dreaming while we sleep is associated with the realm of darkness.

The shadows that crawl across the wall, those things that “go bump in the night”, creaking of the house settling, or the wind blowing can cause paralyzing fear in the dark. It seems that all these things creep up in the dark when we feel most vulnerable, just waiting to wreak havoc on our mind. For many, darkness can be a trigger for panic and overwhelming, intense and irrational fear.

 IN DARKNESS TRUTH CAN BE FOUND

The truth can not be hidden in the realm of darkness. The truth of ourselves that we keep hidden that contains our fear, pain, and our rage –all that unconsciously binds us is revealed before the Mother of Darkness. It is this revelation before the Dark Mother that is one of Her great gifts to us; one of transformation, courage, strength and resolve. In the place of darkness, she offers us the opportunity to be quiet, to contemplate and go deep within ourselves, to question, to reflect and release traumas and issues and receive much-needed healing. In Her dark bosom, we find a place of rest, recovery, nurturing and renewal so that when the time comes we may step into the light with peace, strength. So that we may learn and receive the wisdom and knowledge of the truth of ourselves, and come to understand a different type of beauty and Love that is darkness.

It is in the darkness where we are created and where new life begins. It is where we are created whole, and we are transformed.

 

gibran

There is dark and light in all things and the Goddesses are no exceptions.  All have a darker aspect but this darkness doesn’t have to be seen as bad or evil, just different.  Working with a Dark Goddess can be an empowering experience as it offers us an opportunity for spiritual and personal growth by challenging us to see the truth of ourselves, to recognize our strengths and to nurture and protect ourselves on all levels of being, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  In the Dark Mothers embrace, we are covered in Her divine darkness, led to a place of dreams where we receive visions, messages and where her mysteries are revealed as she imparts wisdom in her holy guidance.  She is the darkness and She is the light in the darkness.  She is all that is, was and shall be, time eternal.

In Love and Darkness,

Aura xoxoxo

candle

There Shall be no fear of the Mother of Darkness,

She who is eternal, She who brings forth and nurtures all life,

She who is the Mother and the Crone, She who is the Transformer of Souls

Let us release ourselves into Her dark and most loving embrace.

She who is the beginning, the middle and end,

She who weaves, measures and cuts the cords

She of Wisdom, Mystery and Power,

In Her is the gift of Truth, Beauty, Strength and Love.

And Oh! How Her love flows endlessly through Her mystic depths!   © Aura Argante 2013

 

Desire, Choice and Experience: It’s What Life is Made of

 

 

I posted this earlier today as a “note” on Facebook. It started out as a simple status message but turned into a wee bit longer than that. So I share it here now as well. ~

The soul is eternal and never-ending. We are souls in physical form, this is our now experience. And still yet, in the physical, our soul desires more experience, that of the “The All”. We, at our core of existence are eternal, creative beings being powerful creators. As such we must become aware of and accept that we, creative creators that are, constantly creating, weaving, shaping, bending and molding, fashion and create our own experiences and our own realities. Yes, it is we, not “God” but yes, all God who is ALL things including we, the creative creators, one with God, or the Universe, who create the experience of wars, suffering, disease, death and destruction just as much as we, the creative creators that are, constantly creating, weaving, shaping, bending and molding, fashion and create the experience of absolute, pure divine love, joy, bliss, harmony and peace. As long as there is that which we call desire, we creative creators, mortal beings with eternal souls craving the experience of “The All” will want and be compelled to to move towards something bigger than ourselves. Because we desire, we will fight and go to war over what we want with others who want the same thing and yet, because of desire, we will create new and amazing love and joy filled experiences that enrich and immerse our mortal creative lives in the wonder, magic and the beauty of life. Desire is the essence of life. It is a longing “to be”, “to exist” and it drives us into experiencing experiences that let us know we are alive.

We are powerful creators that create experiences from what we know, from what we are consciously aware of. “All is All”, it is NOT “One or the Other” or “Only This” or “Only That” and it is not “Some more than the Other”. “All is All”. It is not all Love nor is it the all absence of Love; it is not all light nor is it all dark. “All is All” and it is the desire of our soul to seek and experience All of it, that which is “All”. The experiences in our lives are the experiences that we, the creative creators that are constantly creating, weaving, shaping, bending and molding, fashion and create are experiences that come from our own choice. Every one of them. Yes, it is true. We really are that powerful.

 

Beltane Message 2013 from Queen and King of May

*A Note On My Own Personal Thoughts and Style of Reading Tarot:

I don’t usually post much about tarot but every once in a great while I may get share here and there or even get on ‘ a sharing kick” but for the most part, it’s not my thing to share my interpretations online.  Since I am now, I decided that I will also share a few of my thoughts about tarot and my particular style. There are many different styles of reading as there are readers and not everyone can agree with or are open to other styles. However, it doesn’t mean those other styles are wrong and others are right but merely different and sharing a different perspective only reveals another layer of the Divine mystery that lay within the images of the Tarot. I tell stories with Tarot. Stories come naturally to me and so with the Tarot, magically unfolds the story which is then the message of the moment.

Because each tarot is layers upon layers of deep meaning, I do not try to give every possible meaning to a single card or integrate every symbolic message therein. Trying to squeeze every possible meaning out of one card into one message is like trying to describe the Divine mysteries in one shot. There are as many meanings to the cards and individually as there are people on the planet and forth coming. It just can’t be done. For me, the deeper meaning, the one that is meant for that particular time, tends to get lost among the overwhelming amount of information presented in trying to synthesize the whole to one meaning.  As I already said, the cards are rich with hidden meanings and deep mystery and mysteries can never be explained but experienced and understood and only then one mystery at a time, just like we live our moments, one at a time.

The Tarot is a mystery for a reason; layers upon layers waiting to be discovered and revealed. There is so much meaning to one particular card and certain things jump out and speak at different times for what needs to be heard at that moment or period of time. Each time I read tarot, I uncover another layer and read what I may not have seen before. Here you will not find the detailed description of each card, that of which you can see for yourself. Nor did I show the traditional Waite-Smith deck pics, which I do use for readings as they didn’t fit the energy of my story. Here you will get “only the message, ma’am” as I personally intuited and received it.  I will, however, list symbols from the Waite-Smith deck at the end and what they are typically interpreted as. Again, I don’t get stuck on any one meaning of any given symbol. Each symbol has a multitude of meaning as well.  Some of the symbols may be relevant at this time to the message or not. It’s all a mystery, and the magic of it is experiencing it unfold into your own deep consciousness as it does mine. For me, it almost always unfolds as a story.

With that said, if my interpretation doesn’t mesh with you because you are a reader with your own style or because it just doesn’t then that’s OK. It’s not for you then but it is for someone out there.

And so moving along…

On the 1st of May I contemplated either doing a sabbat spread and tarot reading for Beltane season or just pull a couple of cards. I ended up deciding just pulling a few cards. Thinking of Queens and Kings of May, I decided to only use the court cards and let spirit choose the May Queen and King. The day before I drew the Temperance card and it’s message was about the integration of two or more things happening in the mundane and spiritual levels. Seemed fitting then, the Queen and King of May.

This is what I wrote down in my Tarot Jounal: Oh and by the way I didn’t change much except the typos, which I did out of  courtesy to you dear reader!  Since I couldn’t even read my own handwriting half the time, it took a lot of effort to sit down here and type away and fix things.  But hey, your worth it!  (^__^)/

Who is the  May Queen and King? The Queen of Cups and King of Wands. Oohh..sensual, wet, hot, lusty and sensual, highly sexual connection here. It may not be a forever thing but the time they have is a powerful and magickal time and they definitely make it count.

Personality Types and  Attraction:

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The Queen of Cups is a beautiful, sensual and romantic woman. She is an intuitive, feeling and passionate woman whose love and sexuality and sense of caring run deep. She is receptive and like her ruling element of water that is mutable, adaptable and seems to be flow with change with ease.  She is connected to her highest self and feels through her heart. Although she maintains a sense of control, her feelings of what love and romance are seem to naturally flow just as easily. She’s able to help others makes sense of, get in touch with and understand their own emotions better.

The King of Wands is a natural-born leader, a real go getter kind of guy. He is highly motivated to take action; a determined person who at the same time is not rigid in his ideas and beliefs but rather remains flexible and open to other points of view and ideas even if they don’t match his own. He is authentic, confident, self-actualized individual who is able to express his true nature, the wise, passionate-loving, take charge kind of guy. He is also extremely devoted to his family. His issues are that sometimes he can get carried away by his over enthusiastic optimism and may need to slow his role, so to speak. But once a wild-fire gets going, it’s hard to put out. This is where the lady of cups may help put out or soothe this raging inferno to a more pleasant and beautiful fire. Image

OPPOSITES ATTRACT: INTEGRATION AND ROMANCE:

The King of Wands finds the Queen of Cups sexually appealing loving her vivaciousness, her curves, succulent breasts and wide, rounded hips which he sees as perfect for bearing the children. He sees that she is the ultimate nurturer so in all that they create together, in their hot, passionate sexy couplings, like the sun to the earth, their children shall be well-loved, nurtured and cared for.

The Queen of Cups simply finds the King of Wands hot, charming, utterly irresistible if even only for the time being. He is the hot, fiery, passionate and wild lust and she is the watery, flowing and receptive of his lust and burning sexual attraction.

She is a visionary and because she’s easily adaptable, she shares his vision of bringing forth new life from the fertile and magickal realm their union has created.Image And so together with their visions of a prosperous and abundant earth, they are joined in sacred union of love and passion to bring forth a vision and purpose so much greater than themselves. Image

THE BELTANE MESSAGE:

So maybe they aren’t in it for the long haul. That’s OK. But while they are in it, they are really in it! They are in a passionate, sensual, romantic energetic flow sharing magical, sexual interlude after another; with them, magick is alive and definitely afoot! …and a kiss, a touch and caress and all of those wonderful sensual delights! The King continuously gives his life force, his seed to the Queen of Cups and she lovingly and openly receives and begins to nurture the new life already beginning to form.

Together these two energies of fire and of water, when in perfect balance create the perfect watery, warm and fertile womb from which new life is formed, sustained and comes forth.

This season of Beltane, “in the lusty month of May”, is a time for those ideas, dreams and other goals that you have not yet created, thought of or maybe have put off since the new year. Maybe those ‘resolutions’ that didn’t quite stick–now is a time to start again. This time is a fertile time, the waters of cosmic creation are waiting to receive your passions, your will, your desires; it waits to be impregnated with your wishes for the future. Never is it “too late” to start or begin again. Whether they are short or long-term goals, or creating something altogether new,  the choice is yours the time is now. The fertile environment created by the union of the Queen and Kings watery and fiery realms is about movement, flow and growth. It exists to carry your dreams, wishes and hopes into the sacred center where they can actively grow, be lovingly nourished and be born manifested as reality.

Blessed Be your Beltane season.

Love, Aura

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SYMBOLS OF THE QUEEN OF CUPS:

  • Cups: cups are love, pleasure and water, feminine.
  • Water-feminine, the moon, reflective, mirror like, stillness
  • Crowns: Power, sovereignty, honor, higher being, immortality, triumph and honor.
  • Throne: seat of power, monarchy, official seat of monarch
  • Water: Intuition, emotion, psychic awareness, dreams
  • Chakra: Sacral chakra-Swadhisthana. Lower abdomen, just below navel and in pelvic region; sexual organs and for women, the womb. Pleasure, sexual desire.
  • Blue: Feminine, water, quiet, Goddess, contemplation, tranquility, stillness, deep, reflection, moon and feeling.
  • I-ching: Hexagram 2 : Receptive, Skill, Needing. Going with flow never force.

 

SYMBOLS OF THE KING OF WANDS:

  • wands- according to Golden-Dawn, wands are traditionally associated with fire. Fire is associated with creativity, passion, ambition and spirituality. It’s been said that in order not divulge the Golden Dawns secrets, that Arthur Waite purposely switched the original associations of wands from air to fire; likewise swords from fire to air. I am of that latter camp. However, for this reading and the cards I use, I went with what felt right and fire for wands it was.
  • King: mastery, control, absolute power and respect. Often an older man and a driving force in his realm.
  • Crown: victory, power, immortality, righteousness and rebirth or life after death.
  • Staff: Usually held by the sage or magician. Associated with wisdom, intellect and power of the magi.
  • Throne: seat of power, monarchy, official seat of monarch
  • Element : Fire. Heat, Passion, movement, energy, asseriveness
  • Chakra: Third Chakra-Solar plexus or Manipura, it’s element is fire and it’s located just above the navel in the solar plexus. Vitality, assertiveness, self-confidence, will and determination
  • Colors : red-survival issues (root chakra) strong, intense emotions, (love, anger) determination, life blood.  Said to be masculine but as a Goddess woman who reclaims the “life blood”, I see red as divinely feminine.
  • Yellow: Illumination, light, radiance, the sun, mental activity, self-expression and confidence; ironically, yellow is said to be the color of the coward. Where did we get that expression? …energy, will power, redemption…
  • The I-Ching- Khien , Creative power and skill

I do not own any of these images.

The Things My Heart Says: The Spell of The Ice Queen

Re-posted from my love poetry and musings blog. I posted this there yesterday.

http://insidethiswomansheart.blogspot.com/

 

Last night I fell under the spell of  “The Ice Queen”–the ancient old hag and primordial being who reigned long before the dawn ever was.

 

She came screaming with a vengeance, Her white cloak of death trailing on the ground behind Her.

Brutal, cold and unrelenting She was. Her words icy shrills masked upon the violent and terrifyingly fierce winds of Her breath.

She encircled my house, surrounded it completely in Her winter madness. She beat on my door and I did not let her in. She rattled my windows and with the  great force of Her breath, She shook my house like an apple tree expecting fruit to fall. And still I did not let Her in.

 

She thrashed about in a wicked fury knocking over anything in Her path that was not tightly secured to the ground. Her shrieks and screams ever louder –threatening me She thought She would. And still, I did not let Her in.

 

From inside my humble house looking at Her outside my window, With boldness and strange curiousity I stared Her down. Eye to eye we were, that old hag and I.

Suddenly, without warning that old hag laughed and when She did, I trembled to the bone. But still, I did not let Her in.

 

Then that old hag transformed Herself into the Ice Queen and with a wave of Her hand cast a windy spell of sleepiness over my house and across the land.

 

Even as I slept, deep in my dreams I heard Her howl and I heard Her moan but still, I slept on and kept on dreaming.

 

I woke early this morning  knowing She’s out there. I hear Her still. She waits for me, daring me to step out into Her icy, frozen and dead world.

But here I will stay, deep within Psyche’s Dream

Dreaming big dreams while that old hag howls, moans, shrieks and screams.

No, I will not let Her in.

 

Instead I will stay inside and dream. And dream the biggest of dreams…until spring.

 

 

True story.

 

 

©Copyright 2012 A.Argante